Sunday, December 14, 2008

I'm a Victim ;-)

Some of us love to play the victim. We haven't been treated fairly. We've been oppressed by an evil, powerful person or organization. We can even be victims of second hand smoking.

For a while, I've been telling people that I'm a victim of "second hand dieting". My wife has been on and off diets for much of our marriage. I'd open the refrigerator, ready with my manly appetite only to find "lite" mayonnaise, low fat ice cream, and a variety of other diet foods. Once she made brownies. The smelled good! The looked good! Yuck!! What did she put in them??? A diet book said that you could use apple sauce instead of the oil. Yes, it is lower in fat and calories. No, it is not a brownie.

I guess with enough of my complaining, I am no longer a victim of second had dieting. We've compromised with 2% Milk and have plenty of other good foods.

So my latest victimization happened last week. I was walking our dog "Bo" and a car was driving by. It started to slow, so I was careful to pay attention. Whenever a car slows, there is always a chance it is turning into a nearby driveway and I have to be careful not to get hit. Especially when I'm breaking the law and letting Bo walk off his leash. This car was full of young people and had no intentions of pulling into a driveway. They were stalking ME! They rolled down their windows and I became a victim of a drive by caroling! It was the young women from church coming home from an activity. They saw me and decided to sing Christmas Carols.

I guess I'm a pathetic victimization addict if these are the worst cases of victimization I have experienced.

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